Remember the letter-writer who had? Given the outrage of much of the internet over the letter, I didn t expect to receive an update, and I m grateful that he sent one in. Here it is. I did not realize my message would be fully replicated on your blog. I am sure you get tons of requests and I thought I would be lucky to get a reply within one of those short scenarios at max. Just in time to discover the story going viral, both online and offline. I can say that in no way I expected that writing to a very popular but a niche professional blog would result in such Internet s*t storm. I am sorry for not engaging with your readers, but given the toxicity of many commentators, I did not seem much sense in doing it.
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I am still very much freaked out about the whole experience but since I promised to give you my update, here it is. Those who blamed me for ruining Sylvia’s life for good were wrong. She has done very well for herself. She is married, with kids and her husband is originally from here. They relocated because of his business opportunity, not because she would be stalking me or would orchestrate this in some elaborate vendetta.
It is a crazy coincidence but as some readers pointed out, our professional world can be very small. I immediately reached out to Sylvia, along the lines of your kind advice and also offered to discuss the way forward in person. Here, I appreciate many useful comments from your readers on what to write. She did not get back to me. I also dropped a short message to the HR, without providing full details.
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Next morning (Sunday! ) I got a call from the chair of our board of overseers, asking me to meet him as soon as possible. In a summary, as many of those self-righteous people on the Internet hoped, I came out of this with no job, no severance and no prospect for another job in this city. Obviously, I have to leave as I need to make a living. I will be shortly moving back home for several months to work as a substitute teacher, with an agency.
I will see what next later. So I had my comeuppance. I am most certainly not asking for pity. I only wish there were not other individuals bearing the blunt of my immaturity in the past. (My partner cannot join me due to visa issue and family situation.
)I wrote back and asked if he d share how Sylvia seemed, as well as what measures they d proposed. He said: I do not know how it was for Sylvia. I have not seen her since. She seemed fine.
She was not gleeful, very matter of fact, saying it was possible to work together and etc. The chair did most of the talking.