Meeting guys and having guys interested in me is not a problem. I don t want to sound arrogant, but I m in good shape and everyone tells me how pretty I am so I don t doubt my physical attractiveness. Here s the thing: There is a guy I see a lot (he s a friend of a friend) and I ve developed a crush on him. I was trying to find out if he was into me and a friend of mine quoted him saying that I was a cool girl, but not his type. I really like this guy I want to understand why he doesn t like me and if there s anything I can do to get him to like me and see me as a romantic interest. OK, before I even begin talking about why a guy might like you or not like you, just remember that you really don t KNOW what he said or how he really feels. All you know is something a friend told you he said.
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But here s a common problem I hear from women and men about their dating lives: They can get the ones they don t want to fall head-over-heels in love with them, but when they find someone they want, they fail miserably. It really doesn t matter how good you are with getting people who you don t want to lust for and adore you You don t want them, so they really aren t options anyway. The real issue here is what is the problem that wanting is causing? In other words: If you can have the ones you don t want wrapped around your finger as love slaves, then something about you wanting someone is what s causing the real problem here. He s out of my league / I m not good enough for him Mindset is everything in dating. When you BELIEVE and ASSUME that you are irresistibly attractive and that a man (or any man) wants you hardcore, it often comes about. Thing is, sometimes women make identities out of their problems what starts out as a quirky, lighthearted complaint keeps getting repeated until it suddenly becomes their reality and they believe that this is out of their control. But you need to step up and stop programming your mind with garbage. If you ve been falling into the trap of telling the only-the-ones-I-don t-want-want-me sob story, STOP IT and never do it again. Instead, start brainwashing yourself into this belief: The ones I want the most will find me irresistible and they want me, hard. Now, you may say, Eric, even if I repeated that to myself a thousand times it would still not believe it. Why not? Think about it. There are tons of women even women who are married who have never experienced having men obsessed with them, chasing them, idolizing them you have. You have experience being a type of girl that the vast majority of other women don t have. So if you just stop telling that sob story to yourself and act and BELIEVE around those that you want using the same vibe as the ones you didn t want, then you ll get the same result. And the more in-demand a guy is, the more he s craving to meet a girl who actually feels like a worthy partner to him. You re only not good enough when YOU decide that you aren t good enough.
People can be funny animals at times. I ve known girls that would obsess over guys chasing, checking their texts, etc until he started liking them back or showing signs of commitment. These girls loved the chase. They loved the notch on the belt. But most importantly, they loved the reassurance to their ego having their prize like them back validated them as being good enough in the world. I m not here to judge, but if that s your mindset, then I think you re best course of action is to really examine yourself and see if you have an issue becoming vulnerable to people or opening up. He seemed interested, but then lost interest. Now I m hooked on him and he s withdrawing. Fill your mind with love for yourself the woman who wants love from the world but cannot bring it about in herself will be forever thirsty for love Love always starts within you and flows outward. Plain and simple, he doesn t like me. He s not attracted to me. First, let s be clear on liking and attraction. I remember one girl that I hated at first, but found really attractive. We eventually hooked up and it was actually pretty awesome but that s beside the point. The important thing is not to confuse liking you as a person and feeling attraction for you. Two separate things. I ve had women I ve loved as people but couldn t force an ounce of attraction for them if I tried. And I ve felt tons of attraction to some women who I loathed as people. Nature is funny, I guess. To be clear though, I like the vast majority of women that I m attracted to. I m not trying to say that being hate-able is a strategy for getting guys attracted.
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It s not. I am saying that provoking emotions, positive or negative, is usually a sign that attraction potential is there. This is similar to what I was saying at the first part when you ASSUME he wants you, you are far more likely to have him end up wanting you. Why? Because when you think you re hot, you come across as confident. Most people (and their thoughts) are not well-formed, concrete decisions. They re kind of gray, on-the-fence, neutral thoughts unless spiked with emotion or inspiration from the outside. So when a person believes strong enough that they are hot and irresistible, the minds of others subconsciously pick that up and just roll with it (unless given a massive reason not to). From a psychological standpoint, it s fascinating. I learned this trick from an ex-girlfriend actually. I never told her this, but I was never into fair-skinned girls with freckles just not my type. But I was really into her I thought she was hot, sexy and irresistible. Man, she had me chasing her she definitely played me for a fool. And the power behind how she got me so wrapped-up on her was on this powerful assumption. There was a night where she casually told me, Oh yeah, when me and my friend go to the bar, we act like we own the place. I don t care what people think, I don t care who they are when I am there, I am the celebrity, I get what I want and everyone wants me. And she was right she was actually a fairly shy girl, but when she stepped into a party or bar, she always owned and commanded the room. If you can master what I m explaining here, you ll have that power too. Even if you re not his type. So there you have it why he doesn t like you and what to do to turn the scales in your favor. P.
S. Have you watched our 7 Secrets To Make a Man Love You video yet? We expose the most common mistakes women make that stop a man\'s love dead in its tracks. . And what to do about it. Want to know how much your guy really wants you? Take The Quiz NowWhat do you do though when men you can t stand won t stop hitting on you and you never get a chance to meet anyone you might be interested in? By hitting on I don t mean flirting, cheesy lines or asking you out, I mean agressive PUA techniques, standover tactics, games, trying to stitch you up, internet stalking and just plain bullying, I m talking predatory behaviour and it s everywhere, online, in coffee shops, waiting for a train. I ve worked out if I m dressed up I get less of it, seems to intimidate a few of them, but it s constant harassment and it s starting to get to me, bad enough I ve stopped going out. I ve just moved to a new city so I need to be socializing, how do I shut this down or at least protect myself? Different classes have different types. Low class men are rarely picky, so they take what will have them. No matter what race/color they are. Wealthier men prefer slender women. If you are overweight, most asian and white men will not prefer you. Unless they are in the low class category. Black, latino and middle eastern men mostly don t mind a couple of pounds on a woman. Remember race and class has a lot to do with what is attracted to a certain body type. Notice how I left out face. Men don t give a freak about a womans face. Your body type is the determining factor period.
This is racist and idiotic. The determining factors in attraction are not due to a persons race or wealth. Its personal preference. DUH Maxine, are you from the 6955 s or what? This is some patriarchal oppressive idiocy. Well there are so many women still waiting for their Knight in shinning armor to sweep them off their feet since Most women are now very Picky when it comes to finding love. And what i will Never understand is that many women today are going with the Creepiest looking guys that i have ever seen in my life which i just Don t get it at all, especially when these guys treat them mean with No Respect as well. There are many of us Good men out there that are still Available which unfortunately many women just Can t see that. Because these men that you describe as creepy, are hot. Period. Just like men who can get women dont give a flying f about her face and are looking at the body and sometimes bank account, same thing. Good or not, if she s not attracted to you it ends there, unless she is a golddigger with something to gain from you. I think it s best summed up like this. Men and women think differently. It s NOT the laws of attraction by any means. Depending on just how low the guy s self esteem is he will be intentionally rude to the nice girl who s just as beautiful on the outside as she is on the inside and completely reject her but marry the girl who throws hot coffee in his face and sleeps with all his friends. Some men push away what they really want while women do our best(not in a desperate manner usually) to ATTRACT what we really want. It s all a matter of time. Don t stress about it and just be patient. Good things come to those who are WILLING to wait. 🙂God I love the way you write!
Concise, straight to the point, and full of positive vibes. Love it! But anyways, I just find the whole situation super weird. I almost half don t believe that he truly likes this other girl since what we had seriously felt perfect.