There have been a number of excellent about girls who suffer from personality disorders (like BPD). The general consensus seems to be “run like hell” and while I agree wholeheartedly with this advice, in actuality, most guys will fail to heed the warnings of more experienced men. I ve always been extremely passionate about helping guys handle their breakup challenges. Many times, it’s apparent that their ex is a bit on the crazy side and would make the guy’s life a living hell if he got her back. But whenever I voiced my concerns they would simply say, “Yeah, you’re probably right but I don’t care. What’s my next step? ” I learned that when a man is dead-set on making his situation work, there’s almost nothing you can do to talk him out of it. So this article is for the guys out there whose masochistic tendencies run deep and are ready for a world of pain.
Advice Dating Someone With Borderline Personality
Dating borderline women is like playing the game of thrones with one exception: winning isn’t an option. When you play this game you either lose… or you die. So good luck! Borderline girls typically end up with two types of men: needy tools (who they destroy) and guys with real Dark Triad traits who truly don’t give a shit. Avoiding deep emotional investment is the only way to stay in the game and not get crushed but it’s much easier said than done, especially if you’re not a sociopath. The good news: if you can maintain your frame, you’ll render the competition irrelevant and the girl will be absolutely addicted to you. The bad news: she’ll still be in your life and you’ll have to deal with her craziness on a near-daily basis. So here’s the tricky part: if you’re too much of an aloof asshole, she’ll be unable to trust you and her crazy behavior will just get worse. But if you’re too nice and understanding, she’ll lose her respect and attraction for you. You need to be somewhere in the middle. The way I play it is to always come from the heart, no matter how aggravated I get. Strive to come from a place of care and concern while also having no attachment to the outcome since the sad reality is they truly can’t help their behavior. I understand this sounds like you’re giving them a free pass, but they have a very difficult time understanding that, they alone, are responsible for their misery. Most just can’t accept this and the ones who have this awareness typically hate themselves because they’re unable to stop their bullshit (as much as they’d like to). So whenever you feel the rage building up inside, realize that you would have most likely turned out the same way had you also been abused by your caretakers.
Who she is today is a result of her shitty childhood and this standpoint will make it easier to have concern for her well-being, regardless of the crap you she puts you through. Now, no matter how tight your game, you’re going to be forever locked into a never-ending frame battle. That being said, seeing her as a scared little girl who’s deathly afraid of being hurt or abandoned can help you keep your bearings straight and ride it out. Unfortunately, she equates romantic love with drama and pain and will do her best to create this for herself, with or without your help. Just do your best to stay on point and don’t take her crap personally. If your mindset is, “I need to break this bitch and win the game” then, no matter how many mini-battles you win, you still won’t make much headway. Let me point out that you need to have two different sets of tactics: interacting with her when she’s acting “normal” and dealing with her bat-shit crazy mode. You ll need two distinct strategies because you’re essentially dealing with two different girls. Because of space constraints, this article will only cover what to do when things are on an upswing. Give them lots of fun, good feelings, and a range of emotions. Be dominant, limit your availability, be a bit difficult, etc. The problem most guys run into is that these behaviors are easy to perform in the initial stages of dating but, once a guy gets attached, he lets his good habits fall to the wayside. No exceptions. Sometimes you have to respond to their flirting and physical affection with some of your own, and other times you have to act unaffected and disinterested (there shouldn’t be a discernible pattern). Remember, that if you were with a normal girl, sometimes you’d be in the mood for her affection (and for sex) and sometimes you wouldn’t. You want to mimic this with your borderline girl even when you’re starved for attention and sex (they’re notorious for withdrawing their attention and turning cold for days at the drop of a hat). Be careful with dishing out too much affection (hugs, hand-holding, etc). Sometimes they’ll crave it and other times they’ll be repulsed by it (depending on which part of their personality is taking center stage). As a general rule, refrain from physical affection until they’re showing signs of receptivity.
The Last Psychiatrist Psychopathy Antisocial Personality
In other words, let the cat crawl into your lap before you start petting it. I know a lot of you are rolling your eyes like, “yeah, yeah, I know all this already” but in actuality, guys desire love and affection just like women do and most guys will try to give it to get it, especially when their girl has gone cold. Better to wait for her to be affectionate on her own time. Yes, I know they’ve been a little angel for the last six weeks but expect a crash to happen any day now. Don’t let yourself get addicted to their good side. I’m not entirely sure you can bang the crazy out of them, but frequent orgasms and the satiety of their sexual desires will be the best therapy you can give them. However, not all BPD’s are the same. Some will readily submit to you inside and outside the bedroom and others will refuse to let you take the lead initially. The ones that identify themselves as “independent” will be the most difficult to deal with but if you stay solid, she will eventually open up to you and be comfortable giving up the lead. Just realize it can be a long process which won’t be worth all the effort you’ll have to put in. Don’t try to be their therapist. You can offer them emotional support without being a girlfriend by listening and responding to their frustrations with, “Damn that must be tough. But I have faith that you’ll figure it out. You always do. ” Don’t give them advice or tell them they’re handling a situation improperly. Also, don’t push them to get therapy. On one hand, most will be deeply offended you suggested such a thing and on the other, therapy is rarely effective for borderlines. One of my psychiatrist friends once told me, “There’s not much you can do for these girls other than just wait it out. They almost always grow out of it eventually, although usually not until they hit their 55’s. Until then, you’re pretty much fucked.
” Thanks, doc! This should be enough to get you moving in the right direction (I’ll cover additional strategies in future articles). In the meantime, please realize that life is far too short to waste time on damaged women who refuse to seek out help for themselves. If you’re already in too deep, then hopefully this info will help you get some power back until you’re ready to walk for good. And when that day comes, run as fast as you can because she’ll be right behind you most likely holding an axe. Who in his fucking right mind would consider BPD girls worthy of anything more than a ONS with a false name given? The most at all would be a fuckbuddy. Anyone attempting a LTR with one is just playing with fire like a girl who thinks it s fun to date a serial killer. There are better options out there sex cannot possibly be that good. No pussy is worth your sanity. The only acceptable tactic with a BPD girl is doing a hit-and-run. With an emphasis on run. If it s clear that she s 55 shades of crazy before the bang, I honestly wouldn t even recommend the bang. These women are fucking bad news no matter how you look at them. The *only* exception, perhaps, is if you re in town for business and will be flying back the next day to a place located at least 855+ miles away, and you use a fake name and can reasonably fake a foreign accent and get her to think that you re here from Ecuador (or wherever). I had one like this. Hardcore out of her fucking skull. Great body, great sex, in the hotel. Best part was in the morning she got up and left without a word. We didn t even have to pretend we were going to stay in touch.
Perfect. What kind of crazy was she then? If she wasn t clingy or stab you in the neck just to see what color your blood is today, then she was. ? As I dragged her back to the hotel practically by her hair, she randomly insulted strangers. Not sure how you would categorize that. Dancing with her in the club she seemed to think there were only two of us on the dance floor much to the annoyance of the other party-goers. I think at one point she actually slapped one of my friends in the face, completely unprovoked. I banged her in one bed while my friend slept in the other. She was OK with it once my friend promised not to look. Haha! I agree. Dragging a girl back to your hotel by her hair real classy of youFor implying you re even less classy than her? You re welcome. I m a bit confused though, I thought you were judging her as being lesser than yourself because of her behaviour? You took a strange ( in more ways than one ) woman back to your place, had sex with her in front of your friend and then was relieved when she left in the morning. . I judge that as meaning you must be crazy and a slutThat doesn t sound BPD. More like delusional schizophrenia. BPD is clinically characterized as emotional dysregulation.
Bob your crazy aren t you? Shhhhh don t be ashamed. It s ok we all have our something.