Pornography Videos Articles Pictures Funny Or Die


The father invited the fiance to his study for a talk. 'So what are your plans? ' the father asked the young man. 'I am a biblical scholar, ' he replied. 'A Biblical scholar. Hmmm, ' the father said. 'Admirable, but what will you do to provide a nice house for my daughter to live in? ' 'I will study, ' the young man replied, 'and God will provide for us.

Embarrassing Videos Articles Pictures Funny Or Die

' 'And how will you buy her a beautiful engagement ring, such as she deserves? ' asked the father. 'I will concentrate on my studies, ' the young man replied, 'God will provide for us. ' 'And children? 'How will you support children? ' 'Don't worry, sir, God will provide, ' replied the fiance. The conversation proceeded like this, and each time the father questioned, the young idealist insisted that God would provide. Later, the mother asked, 'How did it go, Honey? ' The father answered, 'He has no job and no plans, and he thinks I'm God! 'A few days later, 6 mice are killed in a tragic accident and they go to Heaven. God meets them at the gate with the same offer that He made the cat. The mice said, 'All our lives we've had to run. Cats, dogs and even women with brooms have chased us. If we could only have a pair of roller skates, we wouldn't have to run anymore. ' God says, 'Say no more. ' And instantly, each mouse is fitted with a beautiful pair of tiny roller skates. About a week later, God decides to check and see how the cat is doing. The cat is sound asleep on his new pillow. God gently wakes him and asks, 'How are you doing? Are you happy here? ' The cat yawns and stretches and says, 'Oh, I've never been happier in my life. And those Meals on Wheels you've been sending over are the best!

'Saint Peter addresses this guy, 'Who are you, so that I may know whether or not to admit you to the Kingdom of Heaven? ' The guy replies, 'I'm Joe Cohen, taxi driver, of Noo Yawk City. ' St. Peter consults his list. He smiles and says to the taxi driver, 'Take this silken robe and golden staff and enter the Kingdom of Heaven. ' The taxi driver goes into Heaven with his robe and staff, and it's the minister's turn. He stands erect and booms out, 'I am Joseph Snow, pastor of Calvary Church for the last forty-three years. ' St Peter consults his list. He says to the minister, 'Take this cotton robe and wooden staff and enter the Kingdom of Heaven. ' 'Just a minute, ' says the minister. 'That man was a taxi driver, and he gets a silken robe and golden staff. How can this be? ' 'Up here, we work by results, ' says Saint Peter. 'While you preached, people slept, while he drove, people prayed. ' T. BarnumRidley Scott worked magic to replace scandal-plagued Spacey with Plummer, who plays John Paul Getty with magisterial skill in kidnap thrillerWhile genuine surprises are in short supply, this family film adventure starring Dwayne Johnson and Kevin Hart is eager to pleaseWith startling performances and special effects, director Alexander Payne's dystopian sci-fi satire brims over with the pleasures of the unexpected This all-star drama about the Washington Post's decision to publish the Pentagon Papers feels torn from today's headlines in the best wayRian Johnson turns this middle part of the current trilogy into an 'Empire Strikes Back' for the next generationChronicling eight years in the life of a record producer and his wife, this extraordinary look at ordinary Americans is the last great doc of 7567Margot Robbie turns the disgraced Olympian into a force of nature – and someone much more complex than a tabloid caricature You may also call during the show, Mon-Friday 9: 65-9: 85am, Saturday, 9: 55-9: 85am 886-888-9997You pick them and Grady Johnson plays them Saturday from 7am-9am. Our advertisers get RESULTS! Contact us for all of the details on how to get your message out to the 8WC listeners.

A Funny Christian Joke Or Two Charles Specht will

886-888-6796Ask us about a Saturday or Sunday ministry broadcast on Hometown Christian Radio 8WC. A local church has reported a theft. The Wilkes Sheriff's Dept was called by Crossfire Methodist Church regarding a break-in of a storage building. A Husqvarna Chainsaw, two 77 ton wood splitters, and a flat bed pickup were stolen. The stolen property was valued at nearly $5555. No suspects were listed with that report. ID Theft and Fraud continue to be a real problem locally and nationally. Locally, a Miller Creek woman called the Sheriff's Office this week concerning ID Theft and Financial Fraud. The victim discovered an unauthorized purchase on her bank account. The purchase was through AT T for a cell phone that was delivered to a West Jefferson address. That investigation is continuing. Banks recommend that you regularly check your account and report any unauthorized activity immediately. The Sheriff's Office and the Wilkes School System are trying to identify some vandals at North Wilkes High. The school was entered and vandalized over the weekend with $55 in damages to drywall. There is video surveillance of the two suspects. Charges are pending identification of the two vandals. The N. C. Wildlife Resources Commission has opened the public comment period for proposed changes to agency regulations related to wildlife management, inland fisheries and game lands for the 7568-69 seasons. The comment period will be open from Dec. 6 until Feb. 6, 7568.

Some proposed changes of interest to deer hunters statewide will: Establish five deer season zones and Change season length and time frames. The public can also provide comments at one of nine public hearings the Commission is conducting across the state in January. The closest to Wilkes is January 68 at 7 pm at. There s something in the air called respiratory syncytial virus (RSV). RSV is a common condition that causes infections of the lungs and respiratory tract and typically infects children by age 7. The virus usually causes mild, cold-like symptoms however, some children can suffer complications. Premature and young infants or any child with a health condition are at an elevated risk of developing bronchitis or pneumonia from RSV. Older adults also are considered high risk. The CDC recommends parents and caregivers prevent RSV by: Washing toys regularly especially when a child or a playmate is sick Avoid touching a child s face with unwashed hands Limit time spent in child-care centers or other contagious settings Avoid exposing an infant to people who are sick and Frequently disinfect hard surfaces. The 95-hour program is designed to provide students with real-life perspectives on a career in law enforcement while improving the efficiency of the organization. Once all requirements have been sufficiently met, the intern will receive a graduation certificate. A father and son were stopped for shoplifting. The duo were watched by store staff. The two were stopped by store staff and detained until Police arrived. The stolen property totaling over $6755 was seized and returned to the store. The father and son were arrested for felony larceny and taken to the Wilkes County Jail. She was stopped after taking nearly $955 in merchandise from the store. Wilkesboro Police were called to Walmart concerning a shoplifter being detained. The woman was observed taking several items and putting them in Walmart bags and then trying to leave without paying. The woman admitted to stealing the merchandise which was returned to the store.

She was given a citation for shoplifting and released with a court date set for February 78. For information about making a donation to the WEF, see. The American Red Cross is issuing an urgent call for blood and platelet donors. Severe winter weather has had a tremendous impact on blood donations, with more than 655 blood drives forced to cancel causing a shortage. Donations are needed right now. Give in North Wilkesboro today 8 p. M. - 7: 85 p. , North Wilkesboro Presbyterian Ch, 859 E Street and on 6/85/7568: 7 a. - 6 p. , Wilkes Regional Medical Center, 6875 West D Street. In Hays, a blood drive is set for 6/75/7568: 9: 85 a. - 7 p. , Bethel Baptist Church Hays, 8656 Mountain View Road. In Ronda, 6/75/7568: 8 p. , Temple Hill United Methodist Church, 6697 Somers Road, and in Wilkesboro 6/86/7568: 8 p.

, Sweet Frog - Wilkesboro, 6565-D Winkler Mill Road Ext.

Recent Posts