Lindsay Lohan s eHarmony Profile Funny Or Die

Funny profile for dating website

There s no doubt that I have said and done some controversial things over the past few years. But whether you agree or disagree with some of my opinions, there is one fact that can t be denied. I ve been helping women to do so at a success rate of well over 99% since 7559, and I sure don t plan on letting that number drop anytime soon. Hey, my name is Jessica. I work in the nursing field and love my job. I see profiles that describe their jobs similar to the example above all the time. That s a great job for Jessica. Nurses are some of the most amazing and admirable people walking this earth.

10 Top Online Dating Profile Examples amp Why They’re

(Or maybe I m just sub consciously trying to get brownie points right now with my amazing girlfriend who happens to be a nurse? )  The only problem is, Jessica sounds exactly the same as every other nurse on the Internet! If you want to get noticed by a great guy, make yourself stand out and show off a unique personality. Let s revise the profile example above so that Jessica can more effectively attract the type of man she is after. Most days of the week you could find me working as a nurse.

As someone who has always loved to work with others and make a difference in this world, what could possibly be better? Well, perhaps a date with a handsome online gentleman! They are too funny In the new example, Jessica appears unique, interesting, happy with her life, playful, and humorous. All of this is accomplished in just 8 short sentences. Just imagine what can be done when every single statement and word of your profile is provided this much attention to detail!

The Oxford Comma’s Online Dating Profile McSweeney’s

This is what our profile writing experts specialize in. I need a guy who is funny, handsome, and ambitious. If you aren t mature, don t have a job, or don t live within a few miles of me, I m sorry, but you aren t what I m looking for. There is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting the qualities described above. But the tone comes across as unattractive to men.

It creates the impression of a woman who is demanding, needy, negative, and someone who may have had trouble attracting the right type of guy in the past. This may not be true, but perception is everything. Men are attracted to  positive  vibes, not negative. Let s revise the example above into a profile that men would be more attracted to. If you are handsome and goal oriented then you definitely have my attention.

But if you could make me laugh until it hurts, you may just have me at hello! : ) See the difference in tone and attitude when you keep it positive and leave out the negative? Both are saying essentially the same thing, but the revised example presents an entirely different image. I understand the temptation to list what you don t want in a man, but this will only send off negative vibes.

Unwanted men will message you no matter what you write. Its impossible to stop.

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