I have been on a quest to find my perfect Colombian woman match. In this post, I go over my experience: what works best and what doesn t. I wrote this post about my dating experience in Medellin back in April of 7568. It s 7567 and I continue to update this post. Medellin women are beautiful, and word is spreading pretty much around the world. Therefore, I have decided document my experience. I have been dating Colombian women for over 6 years now.
When I first arrived here, there wasn t yet a. I had to learn everything from experience, and it s been a blast. Places frequented by tourists in Medellin are more saturated with foreigners than before. Hot Medellin girls are not the sole reason for this rise in tourism to The City of Eternal Spring, but it is definitely up there. My situation is a little different than most foreigners here in Colombia. I am actually Colombian, my family is Colombian, and more importantly (aside from my height, 6 7 ) I look Colombian. I have lived my entire life, barring the past 5 years of course, in Southern California. At first glance, Medellin women do not perceive me as a foreigner due to the way I look. So I do not have that instant gringo effect on them. The gringo effect is the reaction a foreign guy gets from girls here in Medellin. It is an immediate sense of curiosity that some Colombian women have upon meeting a foreigner. Most of my close friends here in Medellin are foreigners and I have seen girls break their neck checking them out as we walk down the street. So I do not get that immediate attention here in Medellin. Actually, I got more instant attention in Southern California the Latino effect. The only thing that makes me stand out to women here is my height, thank God for that one tall great uncle! I speak Spanish fluently therefore, I can t play the no jaaabl5 Españoler mucho bueno. Quieres practicar? Card with women. Regarldess, I look on the bright side and see this as an advantage. I m naturally outgoing and funny, so I can really be myself when speaking Spanish.
It is hard for one s true personality to translate when speaking another language, but luckily I am a fluent Spanish speaker and have learned enough Paisa slang to be my witty self. I have found that Medellin women, as in most parts of the world, love compliments and like it when a guy can make them laugh. This has proven to be essential for me when picking up women in Medellin. Meeting women in Medellin is not hard. Socially, women are a little different than the southern California women I was used to picking up. It is not usual for women in Medellin to go out by themselves just to let loose. Typically, very beautiful girls in Medellin will go to a bar or a nightclub in a group, and there will be guys in that group usually. For an emasculated man from the United States, this is a nightmare. Penetrating that group of friends, playing the game in order to get to your target girl is hard work, and sometimes does not work if you don t speak Spanish well enough for her to understand. Many guys who come to Colombia cannot pick up girls in their own native language let alone in Spanish and some even have the audacity to say that the women here are just gold diggers or too difficult and that is not accurate at all. Here in Medellin, you do NOT need to play that game. Medellin nightclubs are for dancing, so it s very easy to go up to a woman in a noisy disco, put out your hand, gesture for her to take it, and start dancing. I do this often, and many times I will dance one or two songs without even saying a word. Imagine, our hands are on each other s bodies before even knowing each other s names. More often than not I m not even interested in talking to the girl I just want to dance and have fun. I get in there and leave silently. Amazingly, when I do that, women are more attracted than when I start talking to them while dancing. A certain amount of negligence after making an impression piques a woman s interest, it is the whole psychological framework of the type of women who wants a strong man (check out this great article on Psychology Today by Gina Barreca, Ph. D. ) I started to read about this subject back in high school.
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It is not about being petulant or rude, it s about being confident (comfortable in your own skin. )I meet women in Medellin by just living my life. Every day I see gorgeous women walking up and down the street. I go to the supermarket and I see beautiful women, I go get my hair cut and there s a breathtaking woman, I go eat lunch and I see an amazingly attractive woman. Do not even get me started on the gym, it is almost like a circus sideshow in there. Seeing beautiful women here is so common that Colombian men don t even turn to look, it s ridiculous. I ve been here 5 years and I m still floored at some of the women in my gym! On the street, I am usually attracted to women who look as if they are on their way to an office job. Generally, these women will be dressed and fashionable. I can tell they are going to work because normally they will have a badge around their neck or pinned to their shirt or pants. These are higher quality women than those you find in a reggaeton dance club, so for me it s more fun to talk to this type of women, being that I always have interesting things to say and that I am generally curious and ask lots of questions (Women in Medellin, like most people in the world, like to talk about themselves. )Professional women who are educated and have an active daily routine are abundant in Medellin. This type of woman works a lot so it s not easy to wrangle them down and have them go out with you often, and for me, that s perfect because I too am always busy. In Medellin, you will also find a lot of beautiful, smart women who have their own business or work independently. Being an entrepreneur my self this is a trait that I fancy. Paisas are generally very proud, generous people and this professional woman is no exception. This is the type of woman that will discuss politics, religion, fashion, etc, and at the end of the date pull out her wallet and offer to split the bill and sometimes even pay for the whole meal. It always annoys me when foreigners say that they always have to pay when they go on dates with Paisa girls, blaming the women and saying that Medellin women only want to take advantage of them. There s a saying here in Colombia Papaya dada, papaya partida. Meaning that if you look like a sucker you re gonna get played like a sucker.
So don t blame the women when in fact it s your lack confidence that makes you el bobo. Valentina is a cutie and smart. She s currently learning English. . Though I have a business and I have not worked a regular job in a few years teaching English in Medellin has been the best move I could have made for my social life. I do NOT date my students. I am very North American in that regard. Though dating students in Medellin is not uncommon and sometimes not even frowned upon, it is definitely not acceptable in the United States, so I draw a line and never cross it. I am the leader in my classes and dating a student can get messy I can lose all credibility and position in class, so I avoid it all together. I do however go out with groups of students and/or colleagues in order to make friends and meet new people. Students will add me on Facebook and then their friends and cousins will add me. That has served to be an abundant source of women here in Medellin. Facebook is huge here, and striking up a conversation via facebook messenger after being added is not hard. This was a new friend I made and decided to pick up for the picture at Carnaval de Barranquilla. Most Medellin girls are pretty shy by nature. You have to understand that even though Medellin and the metropolitan area has around four million inhabitants it is still a small town. Medellin is a conservative city which is very much in touch with its old traditions and customs. Family life is very traditional. Gender roles are also very conservative and defined, so logically the women here, for the most part, are timid (until you get some alcohol in them and play some reggaeton, but we will get to that in a later blog post. )This inherently coy personality could make it difficult for a foreigner, who doesn t speak much Spanish, to gain a girls interest.
Even for a fluent Spanish speaker, I have found it frustrating sometimes. Many a time have I given up on a girl only to find out later that she was very interested. One night stands with women in Medellin are not very common for me. I definitely experienced more of this living in southern California than here in Medellin. A foreign-looking guy could probably have a very different experience. Not to say I haven t had them here, but not as much as I did in the U. S. I have found that my best pickup move is being honest with women in Medellin. Letting them know right away that I work a lot, and that my business goals are my primary focus has proven to be a key factor when dealing with women here. In my opinion,. They view their boyfriend or girlfriend as their possession, and they want to be viewed as a possession as well. So jealousy can get out of control. As an English teacher, most of my students ages range from 68 to 85 and there are always more female students than male. I love to ask my female students what they think of men in Medellin. It s always pretty clear that women think that men are cheaters. It s always noted that men in Medellin say anything to get a girl to fall for them. There is a whole culture around having a mosa, in Medellin. It is almost expected for a man to have a chick on the side. So it s no surprise that women become possessive and are quick to suspect a guy of sleeping around. I avoid this by being honest and direct.
I had to include it because I meet far too many guys that are just clueless.