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After all:, but the cold hard truth is that some aspects are set in stone. One of those is height and there are few other aspects that cause men as much dating agita as being short. If you re not 6 feet tall or taller, then you may as well just resign yourself to a sexless life of Napoleon jokes. Of course, short is relative what we consider average height varies depending on geographic locale and someone who s 5 6 would consider someone who s 5 9 (the average for American men) to be lucky. But hey, that s cold comfort when women are putting six feet tall, minimum in their dating profiles and your friends all call you Short Round. The thing is, as with many other masculine insecurities, this is predominantly in our heads. At 5 8, I m short for an American caucasian male. Worse, I m the shortest of all my friends who range from 5 6o on the short side, to 6 7 on the tall side.

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But my height has only been as much of a problem as I d let it be. Over the years, I ve dated and slept with women of all heights, ranging from 5 6 to six-foot tall amazons. The trick is understanding how to make height less of an issue. One of the worst things that guys can do to themselves is to get defensive about being short. Look, I get it:

you ve been getting Oompa Loompa jokes since forever. You ve been called midget, Tiny Tim, Grumpy and all the other names. You watch women even women who re around  your height   pass you by to date taller men. Society tends to equate height with masculinity and power when you are lacking in one, you feel that people assume you re lacking in the others as well. You re understandably resentful about it.

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I completely sympathize with it. I have lost track of how many short men I have seen, online and in person, who are seething balls of venom and rancor over the  unfairness of it all. There s a reason why short men are angry and Napoleon complex are stereotypes, after all. The truth is that barely-sublimated anger makes itself known in  every aspect of your life. It bleeds into your body language and into the way you talk and relate to others.

You may think that you re hiding it like the professional poker-player you could be, but in reality, that sour attitude is shining off you like an especially greasy halo. The other common mistake that the height-deficient make is assuming that they re rejected in advance. This pre-rejection theory quickly becomes either an excuse to not approach (thus guaranteeing that nothing happens) or colors the entire interaction (ditto). Approaching  anyone, whether online or in person, with the attitude of I know you don t like me is going to kill  any potential attraction, no matter how awesome you may be otherwise. A shitty attitude, whether angry and aggressive or defeated and negative, will nuke any chance of sex or love faster than telling them that you eat live puppies.

The attitude that your height is a defect and nobody could possibly love a short man is attraction poison. Is height an attractive feature? Yes, it is. But notice how carefully I said  an attractive feature, not  the. There is a world of men who are considered brain-meltingly, panty-soakingly hot who are  also under 5 66.

Jason Statham is 5′9″. Robert Downey Jr.

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