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BNE Property Brisbane Airport Corporation
? Feeling a bit gypped on getting sick. Top of my things to do list tomorrow was get a flu shot. Last winter was a disaster. Lessons were learnt after going from to illness to fucking illness so was hoping a well-timed jab would avoid it but someone got in early. Pretty sure I know who the culprit is and let's just say my gran will be getting a punch in the face next time I see her. Beyond that there has been close to fuck all going on. As the weeks and months tick by it feels like the house building exercise is nothing more than an elaborate way to frustrate and annoy me. We're oh so close but both believably and unbelievably the local council responsible for approvals has taken issue with something. That they previously okayed. I'd probably understand if it weren't such an insignificant thing that affects no one but in a glaring display of double standards, we have examples of other developments where the exact same thing has been approved. Still they won't budge. The builder's words were This is unheard of. All it amounts to is pathetic government employees trying to justify their existence and another reason to hate authority. Dickwads. Okay on to other stuff. The next few paragraphs are basically a wrap of a mostly weekend so with that. Saturday was a busy one with much to do and see. First stop was the chiropractor for some spinal torture. Was under the impression they're not supposed enjoy inflicting pain. Not this guy. Next was post office, a cheese mission and then groceries. Fairly standard morning really. Come mid-afternoon it was back out the door for a first birthday.
Lee Matthew Hillier’s incredible description of mall siege
Had my doubts about the rain holding out because venue was a park with no shelter. Up being quite a production - 95-55 people, every imaginable party food, alcohol and a very impressive oversized cake. You have to wonder who these parties are for sometimes. From there I headed east to drop the GF to meet up with friends on a pub crawl. Don't know what I did to deserve it but she had granted me the night to myself. Shocked, I planned an evening of junk food and sci-fi. All I had to do was get home which of course was no mean feat. Major roadworks all around the city have normally quiet backstreets congested and the freeway is reduced speed so a journey which should have been 65 minutes stretched out to an hour. Sure enough I arrive home, eat, get 65 minutes into Contagion and the phone beeps Can you pick me up in half please? Urgh. And that's about it for the babbling. Prepare to be dazzled by a truly epical update. Check it. The Reverend John Fluff was the pastor in a small town in Ireland. One day he was walking down the high street when he noticed a young lady of his congregation sitting in a pub drinking beer. The Reverend wasn't happy! He walked through the open door of the pub and sat down next to the woman. Miss Fitzgerald he said sternly This is no place for a member of my congregation. Why don't you let me take you home? Sure! She said with a slur, obviously very drunk. When Miss Fitzgerald stood up from the bar, she began to weave back and forth. The Reverend realised that she'd had far too much to drink and grabbed her arms to steady her. When he did, they both lost their balance and tumbled to the floor.
After a few moments, the Reverend wound up on top of Miss Fitzgerald, her skirt hiked up to her waist. The pub landlord looked over and said Oy mate, we won't have any of that carrying on in this pub. The Reverend looked up at the landlord and said But you don't understand. I'm Pastor Fluff. The landlord said Ah well, if you're that far in, ye might as well finish. The Pope had become very ill and was taken to many doctors, none of whom could figure out how to cure him. Finally he was brought to an old physician. After about an hour's examination the physician came out and told the cardinals that he had some good news and some bad news. The bad news was that the pope had a rare disorder of the testicles, which if left untreated, would be fatal. The good news was that all the Pope had to do to be cured, was to have sex. Well, this was not good news to the cardinals, who argued about it at length. Finally they went to the Pope with the doctor and explained the situation. After some thought, the Pope stated I agree, but under four conditions. The cardinals were amazed and there arose quite an uproar. Over the noise a single voice asked And what are the four conditions? The Pope replied First the girl must be blind, so that she cannot see with whom she is having sex. Second, she must be deaf, so that she cannot hear with whom she is having sex. And third, she must be mute so that if somehow she figures out with whom she is having sex, she can tell no one. After another long pause a voice arose and asked And the fourth condition? The Pope replied Big tits. Something to think about when negative people are doing their best to rain on your parade. So remember this story the next time someone who knows nothing and cares less tries to make your life miserable. Why would anyone want to go there? It's crowded and dirty.
You're crazy to go to Rome. So, how are you getting there? We're taking Continental came the reply. We got a great rate! Continental? Exclaimed the hairdresser. That's a terrible airline. Their planes are old, their flight attendants are ugly, and they're always late. So, where are you staying in Rome? We'll be at this exclusive little place over on Rome's Tiber River called Teste. Don't go any further. I know that place. Everybody thinks its gonna be something special and exclusive, but it's really a dump. We're going to go to see the Vatican and maybe get to see the Pope. That's rich laughed the hairdresser. You and a million other people trying to see him. He'll look the size of an ant! A month later, the woman again came in for a hairdo. It was wonderful explained the woman not only were we on time in one of Continental's brand new planes, but it was overbooked, and they bumped us up to first class. The food and wine were wonderful, and I had a handsome 78-year-old steward who waited on me hand and foot. And the hotel was great! They'd just finished a $5 million remodelling job, and now it's a jewel, the finest hotel in the city. They, too, were overbooked, so they apologised and gave us their owner's suite at no extra charge! Well muttered the hairdresser that's all well and good, but I know you didn't get to see the Pope.
Actually, we were quite lucky, because as we toured the Vatican, a Swiss Guard tapped me on the shoulder, and explained that the Pope likes to meet some of the visitors, and if I'd be so kind as to step into his private room and wait, the Pope would personally greet me. Sure enough, five minutes later, His Holiness walked through the door and shook my hand! I knelt down and he spoke a few words to me. Why is one of the most awesome websites in the history of forever?